Conscience

In this ordinary day I sit thinking too much on too many things and praying for peace of mind. A few days past a one week visit from Mr. ATL which prompted a lapse in ..."everything"....I'm left to ponder....

How easy it can become to push righteous thoughts to the back of your mind as you pursue the lusts of the world.

When pressure mounts over days and thoughts of bodies locked in absolute primal rhythm dance through a perverted mind…..grinding to that all too familiar beat….the pleasure of a big man treatment to a yearning, hot body…the allure of a “proper sort out”.

And though the signs are clear, and you recognize the snare, the weakness of the flesh manifests in evident control and you place yourself knowingly as prey…..Praying for strength is done as a reflex but sitting in the seat of sinners could only reap a fall.

In a time when focus is placed on the Lord for his goodness towards us, the sacrifice of his son…the devil breaks through your defenses and now you are ashamed to be in the presence of Him who took you out of the mire of sinfulness and placed you on a pedestal, Him who loves you more than you could love yourself, Him who has carried you through….In the light of the morning, its hard to reconcile, to accept the concept of true metamorphosis from flesh to spirit driven.

My sins are as scarlet will He care enough to wash me Again.