Conundrum

I have finally felt what sex feels like in 2009. Unfortunately the experience left a lot to be desired. I can't say that I am surprised cause emotionless sex is usually quite unfulfilling....I guess I just thought it would be better this time around.

He's a nice enough guy, strong, built, almost as much of a tease as I am, all the elements seemed to fit together and bwoy was I hard up. But somehow, he didn't really touch me. Its one of those things I guess.

He intrigued me for a bit, we share the same earth day, but I had realised from last year that he was an easy target, my interest waned then but I still went ahead. He stroked my hand so gently as we shared his bed afterwards that I felt stifled by my lack of emotion. I bid him goodbye...not even with a kiss...I didn't even fake a good response when he told me he wouldn't let me go....it was like it never happened for me...I treated him like a F--k....what is wrong with me? I made myself better by thinking that he probably thought I was just a f--k too so he got what he deserved.

It didn't feel the way it was supposed to, there was no 'afterglow' like when my Boogie and I got together. I guess the heart and p---y wants what it wants and nothing can fill that void.