Who does this twice in a lifetime??????? Nobody........It seems my results in this matter will not be similar to that of 8 years prior and I will not get the prize.
Today has confirmed in my mind what he wants......he wants to play......he has played me.......clarity is provided yet again and I will go gently into the wind as always, as if there was never anything, as if he was never anything to me........he likes the attention....who wouldn't......he likes the thought of fucking with me, he has recognised that I am better played with than taken seriously, so he continues to double dip in hopes that the real object of his desire will acknowledge his advances, his proposals....he is a Jamaican man and one can never truly fetter a J'can man.
I will not pray for strength to restrain myself in this time of......, I will not hope for a better him or me to be......I will not try to not be affected by this development.........I will simply accept life and its harsh realities.
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