Unexpected and Unnecessary Emotions

I think I've said before in this Blog that I don't like responding to people when I am angry...soooo when I received a message from Mr. ATL at 4:00 a.m. on Saturday morning hoping that I was dreaming about him, I took some time to respond. Truth be told I awoke at 4:04 a.m cause the phone would not stop the infernal alert.....so I accessed, read and went back to bed having only gotten in at 2:30 a.m from the "set-up".

Last night I felt I was in a better place so I responded saying that I had just heard the song La bamba and I would dream about him using his tongue in a similar fashion on a particular part of my body that night. He responded saying my "...dreams will come through soon". I don't know what he had hoped to hear but I sent a message saying that "I know and I would benefit from all he had to offer when the time was right". I meant nothing venomous....I wasn't trying to play a game, I think I merely stated a fact.....clearly, with my reservations and his procrastination in the matter, maybe it would be better if we tried to undress and enjoy each other at another point in our lives...when things aren't so, complicated.

His response revealed that he had not taken the comment in the way it was intended. He asked whether it was impatience that led me to call it off or was I just trying to mess with him and if so why was I sending him mixed signals....What the.....I tried to remain even keeled but it did not work....I spoke about what I meant and midway through my explanation it dawned on me that I had no obligation to this man and ought not to be explaining my actions or words to him. I started getting too pissed so I lied and told him I couldn't get into the matter at the time and had to go.....is he for real???

Yuh si how life work....last year I had a Distraction who was too caught up in himself and who guarded his emotions like Fort Knox, and now I am being Distracted by a man who seems committed to showing too much emotion too soon...mi really salt. He needs to stop that.

I actually thought I was doing the mature thing...taking a step back and letting this one pass cause I cannot deal with another man who is a beacon of patience.....I want passion. I want a man who will take all necessary steps to ensure our mutual satisfaction....I want a man who will not hesitate to seize any opportunity to school me in the sins of the flesh......I want a man who will not tell me that my brother will stand between us getting together, one who won't think that I will not touch something else until I can touch him...and one who won't get upset when I indicate no willingness to follow the plan patiently. Patience is not a virtue I possess so why should I go down this road....I already waited in vain once, it won't happen again. I will leave him to do and feel whatever he thinks is best for him. He's nice to talk to so I see no reason why we can't be bredrens....I will give him some time.