Waiting to Exhale

I am back. It was good too...learnt a lot, on both a professional and personal level.

I got in on Saturday and I made my calls and planned my night...jet lag and the weather had a different plan though. I found myself inclined to revel in the one warm spot I had carved out under the comforter, duvey, sheet, with pillow surrounding me, while I prayed for the thermostat to be true to my setting of 32 degrees....it wasn't. Out of sheer exhaustion though, I slept. I rescheduled my revenge on the world for Sunday.....I won't lie, he was on my mind as I made the call.

I was to have met 2 other persons that day, so I felt safe that I wouldn't do anything foolish until it was time for my partner in sin to join me. As I stepped out in weather that should be classified as illegal, I realised that I had made a biiiig mistake with my packing.......I had been overcome with a feeling of being "girly" so I figured the weather couldn't be too unbearable for my open toed shoes, skirts and dresses, after all it was only October....I was wrong.

As I wrapped up my lunch Lyme, I got a message from my girlfriend cancelling our hook up....Damn. I went back to my crappy, cold room....complained again to the front desk about that and was getting pissed. I decided to make myself pretty for my affair, but he crept into my thoughts as I performed my rituals....Damn. As I opened the door to my other him, I had lost the vibe. He was always intuitive and immediately asked what was wrong...... we talked for a bit shared a glass of wine but eventually made plans for another day.......I think we both knew that that day would never come though....Damn, I can't even be bad anymore.

As I swigged beer from a can from the mini bar after I had kissed him goodbye, I thought about him......how close he may be, who I would be on Monday when I saw him, that he hadn't even called to see if I had made it, that I wanted him despite that.....that I wanted him to abandon himself in my arms...in me.......that I needed to learn to be more patient......that I needed a live blanket in this weather...that I wanted to feel him trail kisses from my lips, down to my neck, over my breasts, tugging and sucking until the warmth of his mouth sends an electric pulse through my spine to my core, warming me....that I needed to bask in the glory of his love making, that I wanted to be lost in him.

My imagination deserted me in protest at the overuse, and refused to spring to action sufficient for me to help myself to minimal relief. I wished he were nearer to being conquered but I knew I had to be patient and ramble no more.